Dust in the Den

A hard moving fact Dust! That pesky stuff seems to be everywhere you turn. Well; I heard there is a great new vacuum cleaner to make the job more enjoyable and as you can think in the ad they depicted a woman smiling away enjoying every second of the vacuuming experience.

Why can’t they show a guy – I ask? Guys vacuum too??? Really now there are thousands of single guys throughout the world who just love to vacuum their places. And I am sure they enjoy it just as much as gals do if maybe not even more with a high tech vacuum cleaner or the dust app.

Now the dust app is very unique in the household and shouldn’t be confused with the do the dishes app. The dust app works like this:
You press it and then you look at the display of your cell phone and it tells you how many inches of dust has accumulated in your place and suggests when you should vacuum again. Can save many a day if the guy has asked some gal over for dinner. Don’t want her showing up and doing the white glove test and finding dust on the shelf – do we?

Then again there’s the more advanced model of vacuum cleaners for those who are more into multi-tasking and gadgets and this I must stress is a real “must have for 2012”.

I will let you in on a little secret right now. Not too many people have this model yet. So do order right away so you don’t have to wait months for this great vacuum cleaner. And can be the first in your neighborhood to have one.
I would scream at the thought of being left behind with an older vacuum cleaner…. Oh the perils of dust!!

Well, here’s how this great vacuum cleaner works and looks. You may need to close your eyes and imagine this once you have read about how it looks, because this way you get a full idea of how great it is.

It’s a floor model that you can pull along across the floor in a wide range of colors too.
On the metal hose bit there’s an extra attachment that you can attach for holding beverages, like a cup of coffee or a beer or for the more demanding vacuumer there’s the wine glass attachment, so if you feel like a little sip while you’re busy.

Plus, there’s the cell phone or TV holder – maybe you want to text a couple of messages to your friends telling them that you are vacuuming and how much fun it is. But the best attachment is the retractable cloths line that you can attach at the back of the vacuum, so that you can dry your cloths while vacuuming. The great thing with this is that it spins around while you are vacuuming, so that by the time you have finished vacuuming your house the laundry is dry too. So no worries about rainy weather. Great thing!!

Additionally, there’s the workout too that goes along with this too, because you have to pull this whole set-up through your house as you vacuum. This saves you the trip to the local fitness studio. I mean really, how can one resist such an experience? It really puts a whole new light on vacuuming – don’t you think?

So next time you have to vacuum do consider this multi- tasking vacuum cleaner to lighten your work load around the house.
Have fun vacuuming!

Billboards are Fading

I read that some city wants to get rid of all its billboards and large signs. I ask that city how can they do that? What is happening to the good’ol things in life and why does everything have to be gotten rid of?

When I sit here and think back to my younger days – oh those wonderful times of yesteryear with the billboards along the side of the road! I feel old now – Help me!!!

Those great billboards that lined the road with some nifty saying or telling you that at the next exit you only have to drive 5 miles and there will be some exciting adventure for the whole family.

Or there was one where I lived with a giant ice-cream cone and as a kid I always dreamed that one day I would get an ice-cream cone that size but somehow my dream never came true and the sign was torn down when I was about 10 years old.

Or there was the happy family driving along without a care in the world in a car waving to all those who passed by. Those were great times.

There were giant burgers or soft drinks that would make your mouth water and as a kid I would beg my parents to take me there only to hear my dad say it was too far away; maybe some other time. My dad must have said that sentence a trillion times every time I saw a billboard with food on it; I wanted to go there and have something to eat.

There were the billboards for tourist attractions too which were really great; promising you the world and wild animals that would eat you alive if you weren’t careful.

Or there was the man-eating creature waiting to devour you when you stopped there. And of course my dad would never stop at such great places because as he put it “That’s a load of hog wash!”

Those words brought tears to my eyes because I wanted to see a real man-eating animal and what did I get just a glimpse of the place as we drove by.

Though one year my dad decided to drive to Florida for Christmas and so we made our way from upstate New York to Florida and that was a trip that left lasting memories in my brain and my dad was the best dad in the world that year and he still is!!!

As we crossed the border into the southern states that’s where the signs began to tell me there were great thing in store if I just keep reading. The first sign was only 200 mile to (whatever the name of the place was) and it went like that every couple of mile so there was a building up of excitement in the car because I knew that was a place to stop at and after my dad driving for hours and listening to me begging from the back seat when will be there and my mom sitting there patently listening to me too. Then the moment came and my dad pulled off the highway to the place with the giant sombrero! I was ecstatic just to see that hat that had been on all the billboards since entering the southern states.

Then we parked and got out and my dad gave me .50 cents so I could get myself a souvenir. That was life and I knew that they would have something there for me! I ran into the store only to see that it was full of tee-shirts and plastic alligators and some sombreros and post cards. Nothing was there that was as exciting as the bill boards. I wanted excitement and looked and looked only to be disappointed and walked back out to the car with my mom and my .50 cents still in my hand.

After we got back onto the highway again my spirits were lifted by the bigger than life signs for pecan pie. I had never seen such huge pies before and they looked really good too along with the happy people who were eating the pies. My dad said we would stop for some of that great looking pecan pie, which we did but I didn’t like the pie so I had to settle for a wonderful chocolate ice-cream sundae.

Those billboards were great!

Then the moment came with the giant orange welcoming you too Florida and there in that state were billboards with giant fish and alligators on them or monkeys and other exotic creatures that I had never seen before.
Those billboards really showed me what life was about and all the great things that life had to offer. I couldn’t sleep in the car because I was so excited that I would miss out on some great picture on a billboard. What pictures they were indeed!!

To all those people who will decide about billboards: Please, don’t get rid of all those great things because that was and makes life so memorable!

My Blanket – My Bed

You need a blanket for your bed to keep you warm on those cool nights. Though sometime that blanket doesn’t seem large enough for your bed when you are asleep next to your guy or gal who seems to be hogging it for themselves and leaving you stranded open to the elements. Life can be so cold!

I bet you all didn’t know that people argue at home about blanket hogger’s and other things in the bedroom. This is something that I never knew before either and I had to wait half of my life before it was reported by some scientist. My golly how long does it take those jokers to get their scientific evidence together???

I will give you some insight into this horrific problem. Maybe some of you may know what I am talking about here too and experienced it also.

The problem is the blanket bed hog (similar to the road hog).You have fought a struggling battle in the night for a little corner of the blanket to keep you warm. I can say that this can be a real chilling experience when it’s winter outside. Summer isn’t so bad because the temperatures don’t normally drop below 0°.

I think blanket hogs have a special gene in them that say: it’s cold out tonight so lets hog the blanket for some fun or they have gone secretly to some blanket hogging course on “how to hog a blanket correctly in 3 easy steps.”

And so before I get into bed I have to dress as if I am going on an arctic expedition so I won’t freeze in the night and my guy can enjoy the warmth of the blanket and snore cutting through the forest at the same time too.

It can be an eye opening and invigorating experience to lie next to someone like that. I can lie there looking at the ceiling contemplating life because I can’t sleep because he’s snoring and I am refreshed because I only have a small corner of the blanket, but thank heavens I have my arctic expedition outfit on for sub-zero temperatures which keeps me warm! It may not be romantic but hey I’m not freezing my backside off.

Plus he has asked me why do I put so much clothing on when I go to bed, because the bedroom is warm enough and that I am not going outside.
I have tried to explain to him the problem but somehow he doesn’t seem to understand that he is hogging all the blanket and that I get cold sometimes in the middle of the night. It is a hopeless battle!!!

Then I struggle for that little piece of blanket and my guy rolls over and says to me: stop hogging all of the blanket. That just takes the cake!!

As if I was the culprit and he was just lying innocently there sleeping soundly and I disturbed his sleep because I wanted a piece of the blanket. How can I be soooo COLD?

Or along with the blanket there’s the rolling over and taking up the whole bed leaving me stranded on the edge and then I have to get up and walk around to the other side and get back into bed. My guy wakes up in the morning and wonders -> why are you on my side of the bed? Of course he can’t remember that he was hogging the whole bed and blanket. Ohhhh, I feel better already just getting all that off my chest; what a night!!!!

But there’s something worse than not having enough blanket.

Can you guess??

Well there you are all snug and warm in bed and you guy or gal hops in with you and thinks “ oh, lets cuddle.” You think “OK” just what I have been waiting for!

And then the shock comes feeling like a lighting strike destroying the moment COLD FEET!! Now that can destroy any thought of anything because those cold feet are defiantly not on the program when it comes to being romantic!!

Like the old saying goes: Cold hands warm heart, Cold feet no sweetheart. Now that holds true.

So if you are thinking about approaching your guy or gal in a romantic way; make sure you have your special I have warm feet romantic socks on so then the other person knows that your feet are warm and that you can cuddle otherwise it can be a cold experience and that you don’t want!

Well, I think you all know now about the trivial perils of the blanket and so don’t forget to share your blanket and not let it turn into a nightly battle.

P.S: more will be reported at a future date here about the wonders of arguing in the bedroom.

Behind the Wheel

Yes, behind the wheel has to do with driving but maybe not as you think it may be. There’s are many drivers out there and they are in all age groups too from young learners to mature adults, and there’s the system to tell us which route we should take so as not to get lost ( so they say). Those great SavNav systems will steer us in a direction that we may or may not what to go depending on the mood of the system.

Those SatNav systems can be really annoying sometimes with the voice telling you to turn here go straight and don’t drive too fast. What does that system want from me? Plus I have to concentrate on my driving too and all the other stuff I may be doing while I am driving -> The perils of modern society!

Remember the good’ol days when the passenger and the backseat drive told you where to go. I mean direction = not what you are thinking; even though you did tell him/her where to go to when you had enough.

That was driving at its best!! You all know what I am talking about here -> the map generation

Nothing more exciting than a good argument about the direction you’re driving or where to turn or are we on the right road and are you holding the map right….

That was an experience and you could voice your opinion turn onto the wrong road the person holding the map could say that you are wrong and then you have to turn around and drive back 20 miles to where you actually wanted to turn. That was simply fun and good for the nerves and everyone in the car got riled-up too.

You don’t have that sort of fun with a SatNav system do you?? I bet not

That stupid little device can only say a limited number of things and can’t answer back plus, it does steer you in the wrong direction too because for some reason or another it doesn’t know if there’s a dead-end ahead or if it’s a one way street. And when you do follow what it says and you end up in the wrong place and what can you say : You jerk ( no swearing here – but in your car you can say what you like.)

I miss the map and when I drive around with my guy there’s no more fun conversation either about, is this the right street or so. That stupid device has ruined my life!!
I like a good heated conversation while driving and giving directions. I call that communication and by the time we both arrive at our destination we both feel relaxed because we have gotten all our stress out of our system before we arrive and that a SatNav system can’t do because no one is talking so each of you may have built-up a bit of tension from listening to that thing but no one says anything.

Really boring!!

They should bring back the paper map so that everybody can have fun while driving and not just sit there like a bump on a log.

So, get out your paper maps now and enjoy a good trip in your car because it more fun than listening to a computer voice!

Electric Cars

Electric cars are the coming thing in transport and many people are interested in them as are the manufacturers that what you to buy them.
Are they really good for the environment or are those manufactures just jumping on the “Eco Bandwagon” trying to convince us that we need such a vehicle?

Those folks at the auto manufactures have invested tons of money and I am sure they want a return on their investment and so have to push their product no matter what.

What I don’t understand is where is the electricity going to come from to power those electric vehicles; when they want to shut down more atomic power plants that produce electricity.

You need electricity for everything now-a-days besides a car. Just think about it for a moment.

You need electricity from the time you get-up to the time you go to bed plus even when you are asleep too. You need electricity for almost every step you take.

Your alarm clock goes off – electricity

Your coffee at home or in a café – electricity

Radio, TV, at work, or shopping , and at the gas station – you need electricity.

Your computer or cell phone, cooking or eating out it is all connected to electricity and then I am supposed to buy an electric car to save energy?

Please tell me how???

I ask those folks making electric cars: How am I saving electricity with an electric car?
Plus, I can’t drive very far either before I have to recharge the battery again. And that means I need electricity for my car and if I have to wait I’ll drink a coffee and/ or have something to eat, and playing with my computer too -> you need electricity.

I am dumbfounded here with all this electricity because at the end of the day no one is using less electricity, and they may be using more because some marketing person is saying everything is energy efficient so please buy more of everything that runs on electricity!

But where is the extra electricity going to come from and who’s going to pay the price for it??

And so everyone goes out with a good feeling and buys more thinking that they are doing their share because that little rating label on the product say so. Has anyone thought about the production methods behind the product or where it is shipped from and the amount of electricity and other sorts of resources that are used to produce it? I bet not

Electricity is also a precious thing and resources are required to produce it too and I think people should be aware or make themselves aware of how much electricity they actually use in the course of a day otherwise too the lights may go out for a long time and there you are sitting in the dark because no one thought about how much electricity they needed and your electric car will sit in the garage too because there won’t be enough electricity to run it either like your gas run car.

Be aware of how much energy you use and think about your next purchase of an electrical appliance be it large or small -> are you really saving and do you really need it?

Smell of Love

Who said you can’t smell love? That’s nonsense because someone has come up with a special spray so you can.
This I believe is baloney!!

You don’t need a spray to smell love; you just know it. Remember your first love – oh those were the days! You seemed to be floating on a cloud of happiness and the world smelt wonderful and was. You seemed to have a feeling of joy that couldn’t be put into words; oh I was happy!!

My heart is fluttering thinking back on those times.

Then we get a bit older but we still don’t need a spray for love because you know that you love the other person and your senses are twirling around inside you. The joy and the smell of love.

Maybe after sometime people forget about the smell of love and should be reminded about it but a spray cannot replace your feelings only the real smell of love works if you love each other.

What is the smell of love and how can you define it?

This is something only you can answer because how I smell love may not be the same as how you smell love.

The smell of love cannot be bought because it isn’t tangible nor can you smell love via the internet either. You are only infatuated with the virtual contact and there is no smell of love.

So where’s the smell of love? Does springtime bring about the smell of love with the days getting warmer and that warmth fills our hearts giving us the smell of love. Or maybe in the summer you can smell love when you are together with the person you love. I think the smell of love doesn’t have any seasons; it’s always there with us where ever we go.

But sometimes the small of love can go sour and spoil our smell of love, but once you have gotten over that sour smell then you can rediscover the smell of love that you thought was forgotten.

Enjoy the smell of love because it is always there in your heart and you cannot buy the precious smell of love.

Men and Cars

As you can imagine from the title this has something to do with men and their passion for cars.
Today my guy took it upon himself to drag me to an auto show where a huge hall was filled with all models of cars manufactured by some European company.

There I was and let me tell you I wasn’t the only gal there not too excited about how much horsepower the car had or what sort of tires it had. There were lots of gals there just standing looking into space while their other half was prancing around the car like it was an object that has never been seen before.

Actually, I wanted to ask each gal” are you having a good time or are you here like me,; just along for the ride?” I am pretty sure most were in the same boat as I was. If I asked my guy to come look at handbags he would tell me that I am nuts and that I can do that alone or with one of my gal friends. But with cars I have to be dragged along for some reason which I am sorry to say I cannot answer.

The men themselves were more interesting than the cars were; because it seemed each one was trying to outdo the other by the way they swayed up to the car and stood in front of it. It was like being in the Wild West without a horse. Gals I am sure you know what I am talking about.

Somehow I think most of the men there had forgotten where they were and of course who knows more about which model is very important or for example MPG and so forth. Men say we gals have a handbag problem but when I was standing there I thought if all these guys here had enough space at home each one of them would have bought at least 5 cars and have them on display in their garage all shining and nice but not to be touched by the female species.

My guy came across a model which he found interesting and talked to some guy for 45 minutes about this and that. I wasn’t there anymore and when he was finished he turned and said to me” oh, you are still here?” I thought were should I be? His mind was clouded by the fresh leather interiors and shiny paint, and I was lost only to be an object there to hold onto the brochures.

But then I got bored and thought I will look around myself while he’s gossiping with some guys about whatever.

There before my eyes was my car! It was like a handbag screaming at me saying “buy me.” I stood there before it and saw myself sitting behind the while driving endlessly through the countryside with the top down and the sun shining and not a care in the world. I was in heaven!

But I was brought back to reality because I didn’t have the right amount of small change with me. So my driving around in the convertible was brought to an abrupt halt. Though it was great for a couple of minutes and I could amuse myself until I was brought back to reality again for the 2nd time by the salesman saying that car was for younger folks and I should maybe take a look at the other model with seats that are easier to get out of. You can just image the look I gave him and walked away! Men don’t they think gals can’t like cars too?

Well, after wandering around I found my guy still in the same spot that I left him but only to find the number of other guys in the conversation had increased to 6 now. I thought -> how can I get his attention? Maybe jump up and down, scream or stand on my head? I tried the old fashioned way of tugging on his sweater but no luck so I said to him that I wanted to go home. That was a mistake with a capital “M”.

Gals never; I repeat never say that at a car show.. I will spare you the rest here.

So, gals if your guy asks if you want to go to a car show with him than I would nicely suggest that you say “You can go alone and I can enjoy a nice day out with the gals.” This way saving a lot of grief on both sides and the men can enjoy their time with the cars and we can enjoy our time with the handbags!

Enjoy your day whatever you decide to do!

My Mood and My Glasses

There supposedly are glasses that when you wear them they will affect your mood so you won’t eat so much.

I guess they work the same way as the mood rings from the 60’s or 70’s (can’t remember) but I did own one and may still have it amongst the junk in my attic. Those were great rings cause they changed color with your mood and so everyone knew how you felt. Whether or not it was true; who cared, because it was cool to see the ring change colors!

Well, the way I understand it is with the glasses (though I am not exactly sure) is when you put the glasses on you won’t eat too much. Though I doubt this very much and think it’s just another sales gimmick and think that they actually have another purpose like warning those around you about your mood.

Now I see this as a really great thing because everyone is wearing a pair of these and so you are warned in advance if the other person is for example in a bad mood.

This could be a real nerve saver at home because you know right-a-way what sort of mood your guy or gal is in and this way you can save yourself a lot of agony and nerves. Or you know right a-way when they’re in a good mood too, thus taking the guess work out of things.

The main thing is when you see “red” – watch out!! That means bad mood and if you are not careful that could lead to an argument. That’s a stay away color.

But if you like to take risks, then when you see “red” it is a good opportunity for an argument and so now you have a reason to have one. This really takes the guess work out of arguing and you can plan which topics you want to argue about too.

“Green” means I’m in a good mood and will take you shopping. Great for gals who want a new pair of shoes or a handbag because he will be paying. I love life!!!

But with “Green” it is good if you want to get your guy to do something around the house too because you know from the color that he will repair the leaky faucet or mow the grass.
Saving your nerves and getting the job done that should be done. Again it is advisable to have a list on hand so when you see that his glasses are “green”, then you know what to ask, thus avoiding confusion. I have my list!

“Yellow” means you should be a bit careful because the person is on the borderline of being happy or getting upset. Here you are treading on thin ice so diplomacy is recommended here.

But with “yellow” there is always a slight tinge of the other color so you know which direction the person is heading and then you can either have your arguing list or your “green” list handy and can mentally adjust to the situation.

Plus if you prefer, then write your list on your cell phone with the note app, so then you don’t need to worry about losing the pieces of paper and forgetting those important topics.

I will give you a little peek at my lists and please don’t tell my guy about it cause I don’t what him to know my strategy for arguing or what I want from him.

Red list:

Put the toilet seat down – this drives me nuts!

Uses a new glass all the time – does he really need a new glass for each glass of water and I am not his maid!

Leaves the newspaper all over the place – maybe I would like to read it and not have to hunt down each section or does he think I need more exercise?

Green list:

Paint the kitchen – will only take 2 hours to do and I have already bought the paint.

Trim the hedge – one hour and you get fresh air too.

Take me out – any place he wants, because I am happy he is taking me out!

I know many of you may have some other ideas for each list and may even be better than mine. I just don’t want to press my luck and I would update my lists monthly too.

So, folks if you want to make your life a bit easier then maybe you should consider a pair of these glasses,and since my guys birthday is coming up I think I will buy him a pair and then it will only be smooth sailing in the future because I know his mood.

Maturing Technology

I know you think I am going to write about cheese when I use the word maturing but sorry. No, I am talking about the maturing populous using modern technology.

I noticed since I have my new PDA that the letters are smaller on the phone and that somehow everything is written smaller. Do they do this to fit more on the phone or do I need glasses? I’m not too sure.

And the texting needs of a mature adult maybe somewhat different than that of a 20 year old too.

So my aunt( great person and a good cook – do stop by her place if you are driving by and she can whip you up a good 3 course meal for just $15.00 and you get a half a cup of coffee on the house!) Sorry, got bit side tracked thinking about my aunt.

Anyways, she brought to my attention that there are new text abbreviations for your cell phone for mature (sounds better then aging citizens or seniors) adults, so that you can inform your friends about what is happening in your life. I think that is great because than no generation is getting left behind with the advances in technology.

I will give you a small sample of that great info that fell into my hands:

ATK: At The Kid’s -> just in case, than everyone will know where to find me and if it’s boring please call me and we can do something else more exciting!

BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth-> please do because I am serving a meal that you have to chew or else you don’t get anything to eat here.

FWIA: Forgot Where I am-> am I at Mary’s or Bob’s place?

GBM: Good Bowel Movement -> finally the laxative that I took on Monday worked and thought you would like to know about it.

LOMD: Laughing Out my Dentures -> forgot to glue my teeth in this morning and they fell out while I was having a good laugh with the gals.

OMSF: Oh Man! Sorry, Farted. -> was that me that farted?

WAITT: Who Am I Talking To? -> did I call you and why are you answering the phone?

DTP: Dam Those Prunes? -> yesterday’s steak doesn’t seem to want to leave my body after eating a 100 prunes – help!!

Those are just a few of the fantastic texting abbreviations for maturing adults and I am sure there are some other really great ones out there too that you can use to send text messages to your friends.

So all mature citizens of the world enjoy a good text message with your friends and have a great day too!

That Magazine

While out shopping a couple of weeks ago I noticed amongst the magazines one for “How to get a bikini figure in 10 days”

Well, you can just think what I did -> bought the magazine!!

I knew right away that if I do what the magazine says to do; exercising, and eating a special diet and so forth then I will look like a goddess in my bikini and every guy will be looking at me, and I will be the envy of all the gals on the beach.

So, I started doing the work outs every morning like it was suggested. Mentally I felt better but physically I couldn’t/ can’t see much difference or maybe I am tooooo old for those exercises and they only work on under 25’s, and if you are older than that -> well you can just hang it up!

To top that I went out and spent a fortune on the recommended food that I should eat and thought to myself “this would be good for my husband too.”

WRONG…..

He said that he didn’t want to spend 10 days starving to death just because some magazine promises me a new look. And to top it off he wanted to bet $100.00 with me that I wouldn’t hold out for 10 days.
I knew at that moment that he would be in for a challenge and I could see myself in my new bikini that I’ll buy when I win the bet. I feel better already!

I suffered for 10 days eating my so called great food, but found it tasted like nothing and those pounds did not really melt off my body like they promised. And my husband had to add his two cents by saying “Honey, where’s your bikini figure because I can’t see much of a difference.”

I could have given him a black eye, but thought the better of it.

I mean really couldn’t he see the difference??? My scales said that I lost 2 pounds – OK, I’m only 8 pounds off. And when I looked in the mirror I could clearly see my bikini figure now.

Though I will admit it depends on what sort of bikini you are wearing.

Now that I have finished my “ how to get a bikini figure in 10 days”; I think I will celebrate and enjoy life again.

Don’t believe everything written in all those magazines because I can say it doesn’t always work.

So, whether you have a bikini figure or not, who cares enjoy the beach anyways!