Techi Talk

Today with all these new techi computer words floating around I wonder what else they could mean besides there computer meaning and as a gal who isn’t always up to date in the world of computers and only recently being exposed to wonders of modern technology, I must say I was fascinated as to how I could translate those words into totally everyday means………

So, I thought I would give it a go and maybe you can relate to some of the translations too……..

API – always people interfere(You know the problem when you are trying to do something.)
Boot – sorry I only have one and lost the other boot. Bad if the weather isn’t so good outside.
Cloud- look up into the sky and see the wonders of nature
Chrome- Normally used as a plating for metal, but what do I know……..
Dialer – wasn’t that the thing on the telephones from yesteryear??

FAT – Find any things? This is good when looking for something
Gnome – that thing that was popular one time that lots of people had in their gardens or on their lawns…..
Hardware – something you do need when doing repairs around the house, and then you need to go to the hardware store to get the stuff you need to fix-up whatever you are fixing-up……. Makes sense????
HTML – How that much liked??? There you got it when wanting an opinion; just ask HTML….
Key- Something I need to get into my house
Laptop – That word is ,well how can I say it…… Sounds dated for computer words

Malware – That can happen when you get moles in your garden and they ruin everything, then you got a serious case of Malware!
MSP- This is a word to watch-out for ( Many serious problems) because it does direct one in a some what negative direction, but not really saying anything about what the problem is, so MSP it next time you have some issues.

Open office – the good old open office plan that has been around for years with everyone working in the same room together….OMG….. no thank you!
Plug in – easy plug the plug in the socket…. it couldn’t be any simpler.
Pop up – that happens when you put bread in the toaster to be toasted and when it is done being toasted it pop’s-up

PDF – oh, an office nightmare….Photocopier Doesn’t Function
QNX – now here you need a bit of imagination: Quite Normal Expressions; when translated into computer lingo means nothing is new.
Root – every plant has this… nothing new
Server- those folks must have gotten this inspiring word while they were drinking a coffee at a coffee shop and a server served them.

USB – Again a fascinating word : Underlying useless business….. This does happen in the business world,so be careful not to waste your time.
Virus – bad news with winter coming in a couple of months there are always lots of theses in the air,so take care.
Wine – Tastes good sometimes with meals and come in different colors too.
Zip – those are on many jackets and other garments worn.

Now after translating these wonderful words you now may be better able to understand the other meanings as to how we non computer professional can keep up with the world of words today.

Computer folks keep those great words coming… GWC for now!

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My Handbag hasn’t got a Leak yet…

Really now, there is something for everyone nowadays, and that includes the lovers of handbags… including me!!
I just got to reading earlier this morning and low and behold what article popped into my face.. Yes, a handbag that serves/ holds your favorite beverage…
Not like you think though… it has a built-in thingy that holds your beverage of choice… and to be honest, okay, if you don’t want others to know that you are taking a nip of a certain beverage, but otherwise I am not tooooo convinced of its functionality, and a spigot on the side of the bag is not my idea of a good looking hand bag nor of cleanliness either. Or am I just out of it when it comes to fashion statements???

Plus, a small bottle of water or the sorts is just as good and just imagine, you fill your handbag up with a beverage and the container springs a leak… Then what!!! Scream or cry or maybe even both, if you’ve got some precious things in your handbag…..

My eyes are watering already with that thought… or even worse my Mascara is running down my face at this thought…. Everything is ruined, but then to prevent this I need the super duper waterproof bag in a bag to prevent the worst case scenario….

But, you never know… Invited to a party or out with friends … You got it!! Beverages are on hand and if a group of you have the same sort of handbags then…. Hey, let’s have a party!!! Drinks galore!!! I mean really, I always have a couple of cups in my hand bag for such occasions; should I run into a friend with that sort of handbag. I bet you have cups in your handbag, too???

Though I must be honest here and say that none of my friends have such handbags… Why they don’t I cannot say… Sorry
A somewhat concerning thought for me is while I am out and about and may have a bit of red wine left over from last evening in my bag( please don’t tell anyone my secret here) and I accidently catch the spigot on my clothing …. Then a red wine stain and how do I explain that at work and hope that everyone believes me???? Any answers???
Plus, how do I clean this beverage container thingy handbag?? I feel really perplexed with such thoughts.. Or who cares …

Another thought is how much does such a handbag cost and where can I buy one, should I ever what one??? And does it have a built in cooling system for those hot days in the summer or does it keep my beverages warm in the winter and what does it weigh…. These questions need to be answered, don’t they and I bet you thought the same as I was thinking, but just afraid to ask those questions… Don’t be, because no question is too dumb, if you don’t know the answer…

Though, should any of you out there own such a handbag, please do let us all know and maybe even send us a picture of you using it… Thanks, we are all curious, too!

Enjoy you handbag no matter what style it is….

Puff and Play

A little play on words (smoking, playing a game on a Smartphone, and drinking coffee)
The other day at work some guys I don’t know too well started to talk about what they do on their coffee break, and as a typical women who loves to hear about what others do….. I knew I had to listen in….I’m sure some of you do that too or not???

To me it was rather amazing to listen to how they took their coffee breaks… sure there are those who just stand around and sip their coffee and hope to get the low-down on what is going on in the office without actually partaking in any conversation; there are those who take their coffee back to their desks and dream about destinations outside of the office, and the sort who know everything going on in the office (if they actually do…. That could be questionable???)

Nowadays there is a new sort of coffee breakers who say the heck with conversation and absorb themselves in the world of coffee, having a smoke and their games on their Smartphone’s….. That’s today’s world whether you like it or not…. Welcome in the 21st century!!

But what is important here is just to image how they manage to “puff and play” and drink coffee all at the same time…. Being a woman with an imagination I can picture it now as to how they multi-task on their coffee break…..
All you have to do is sit-back and shut your eyes to image how it would be (Firstly, though read below and then shut your eyes to get the full picture..)

Now to do this properly one has to get a hold of the coffee break, Smartphone, ashtray set-up, otherwise forget it! This set- up is for everyone and not restricted only to guys…. Before heading to the break area one must strap around their waist the handy coffee break belt with the built in, pull-out tray, ashtray and Smartphone holder, so leaving your hands free for other important things , should they arise.

You need a coffee mug that is not too heavy, otherwise the tray could get too heavy and tip over and you spill coffee on yourself…. A definite no go in today’s office world! And don’t forget to keep your ashtray clean too.. No old butts!!

Okay! Coffee break time has started and everyone is getting their coffee break waist tray out and securing it in place, Smartphone’s are on the tray charged up for the next round of action that has been burning your fingers, because you had to work before… coffee is in the cup and ciggi in the mouth…. Sort of like those old black and white movies….. Anticipation is mounting, the Smartphone is blinking and you are so excited that you are winning the game you are playing, you are lost in another world no longer at work, but sunk deep within the realms of the game, coffee forgotten ashes falling from your ciggi into the coffee that is on your waist tray…. No one notices… you take a sip of your coffee and think to yourself “who made this S…..?” But who cares the screen is blinking things are happening the Smartphone has taken hold of your senses and you forget the world around you because you want power and fame that the game gives you, and not the desk job that you are doing!

Through all this action and excitement your ciggi has burnt down to the filter and you stand there with just the filter in your mouth, and your Smartphone in your hand and you wanting to drink that beloved cup of coffee, but NO…… the coffee break time is over and now you have to go back to your desk and wonder and wait until the next break comes where you can dive again into the world of adventure, and ciggi’s and coffee…

The boss comes along and says „Coffee break over…. Everyone back to work now!”

That’s life in the office…..

I’m rich or maybe not?

I have been receiving emails the past couple of days, okay actually the last week too about how much money some nice person wants to give me….. I mean WOW…. A billion dollars is a lot of money and it could be mine if I just send them my bank account info and $7,000.00 …. I guess that is a small price to pay for sooooo much money, but why me??? I don’t know those folks and out of nowhere I am getting emails offering me that kind of cash….

Somehow I don’t see it being an honest offer, but then there are the other emails offering me ways to spend my money….. Do they know that I was offered a billion dollars??? And besides that I could get even richer if I watch a video about how a grandmother became a millionaire overnight….. Now that is something….. Go to sleep wake-up the next morning and “Bingo” rich!!! I bet the elderly women won the money playing bingo, but they don’t want to tell me…… Bingo parlor here I come!!!

To be really honest, I am not a bingo playing person, so I guess I will have to watch another video on how to make a fortune, and then spend it on some great offers that is sent to me……..

Then there was an email that I received yesterday in the subject line they called me a “ jerk”… now that person who wrote that really needs to think and learn how to write, because if I wrote to people and friends with the word “ Jerk” in the subject line….. I know for sure they would not be too happy and would say “Good-bye friendship”. I feel some folks are just plain cheeky and I think they are “jerks” too!

What confused me was the email saying that they were trying to phone me and that I didn’t answer my phone and all I had to do was give them my phone number and they would call me back….. But in the subject line was “we tried to call you and you didn’t answer”….. Somehow a bit contradictory …. I mean really if you know me you know my phone number and that is the point…. I don’t think they know me and are trying to trick me like all the others with the offers of money and so forth.

But reading can be fun…. My question from April this year can be answered now….. I don’t even remember asking a question in an email; but then again my brain isn’t that young anymore and maybe I did ask…. I didn’t recognize the senders name so I guess I never asked anything in April that was important and if it takes so long to answer my question then it wasn’t that important, so forget it!! Press delete…..

And what is so great is the names of the people who send those emails… it is beyond me though; sometimes I think they get their wires crossed themselves… I got 6 emails from the same person, but in different countries.

But my order has been fulfilled and all I have to do is send the money and sooner or more like never I will get my goods that I have never ordered……. Their imagination seems to be getting somewhat limited here.

Read on but don’t click on those wonderful and often to good to be true nonsense…

Beany Bye-Bye

Not long ago when two people wanted to part and go their own way;you actually spoke to each other and said that “the relationship” is over…… a situation that requires tackt and nerves to say that….

Then along came the good’old text messaging and so only with a few words and not having to look the other person in the eyes…. Write the text and press “send” and the relationship is/has ended and then a quick login on a social network and the person changes their status to “single” again and now the world knows , with just a quick click you are alone again….

How easy it is to say “good-bye” and I don’t want to be with you anymore….. How impersonal electronic devices and the Internet make the world!

But now there is this so called “bean plant” that can do the job for you as I recently read. Just put the seed in the soil and follow the instructions and then in about 5 days you have a plant and on a leaf is written” It’s over” …. I see this as even worse than a text message, because a text message you get right away and with the seed thing you have to wait. This may make the person think that they are loved and not being dumped, or maybe it’s Good, because in the germination period you may decide to get back together again and dispose of the plant before you can see its leafs….. The wonders of nature!

I wonder if the folks who thought this bean thing up was having relationship problems and didn’t know how to say “good-bye”…… The never ending ways of breaking-up

If anyone out there has tried this method of breaking-up….. We all would be very grateful if you would let us all know how the person who received the ” break-up bean” reacted? 

Life can be painful at times but greenery still has its moments! 

Multi-tasking and My Attention

What I just read seemed to pop my bubble of how I thought us gals were great at multi-tasking, but NOOOOO, guys are supposedly better at least according to some study. I think they forgot to ask me and a couple of other gals about this topic of “Multi-tasking” to hear what we have to say about guys being great at it.

Okay, guys please don’t get me wrong here, but I really don’t see many guys doing more than one thing at a time, and this defiantly holds true when something has to be done…. No multi-tasking…. Just “I’ll do it when I have time”….. When that time is or will be is another question, but not now, later.

Plus, what is “multi-tasking”… drinking a beer and watching a soccer game or football game on TV all at the same time??? A challenging thought…. But no, it has to be more like drinking a coffee in the morning and reading the newspaper at the same time, or monkying around with your Smartphone and texting at the same time while sitting on the sofa and pretending to hear what I have to say. I am sure the list could be endless…. And some guys and gals can relate to this here.

As a gal my “multi-tasking” tasks are endless… Make breakfast, clean-up cook dinner set the table, go to work… talk on the phone , write an email, and the list goes on… I seem to be always doing two tasks at once, and it’s endless… but I’m not good at “multi-tasking” according to the study because I am a gal…..

I feel somewhat heartbroken with that thought, because I wanted to win the “Multi-Tasking gal of the year award 2015”, so that I could proudly display the award, and when you would walk into my home there on the wall…on display my “ Multi-tasking” award, but NO, so now what???
I’m doomed because of some article…. No, cool award on my wall this year!!!

But that isn’t the only thing going on… My attention span has been compared to a gold-fish… Now that just takes the cake!!! Okay, no cake on offer but still, I think I have a good attention span and can hold out a bit longer than a gold-fish.

But then again, I haven’t been hanging around any gold-fish lately, and to be honest; I’m not friends with any either…. What I don’t understand is; how can you ask a gold-fish if it is interested in something, and I am sure my interests are not the same as a fishes interests are….. Or am I over looking something???? Though it could be with the “multi-tasking” that a gold-fish is good at it and they meant that “guy” gold-fish are good “multi-taskers” . Now I’m curious?????

I need to get in contact with those “multi-tasking” guys and ask them about this whole thing… I can see it now “Gold fish are multi-tasking experts and have short attention spans” and this we know because we did an exclusive interview with Mr. Gold fish; the top ranking gold-fish in his tank! … That would be a real page turner!!!

So, if you own a gold-fish… Watch out and keep an eye on the “Multi-tasker(s)” in your home too!

Job Application …… Lebenslauf

HI everyone,
I thought I would share this with you.
Euer,
Freddi die Bratpfanne

Freddi die Bratpfanne und Henny

Hi friends,
Yes the week is about to end and I (Freddi) am looking for a job. Like you all know Henny has one. She’s a CEO of a big company and it seems that sometimes she is so busy that she doesn’t have enough time for me. So I thought I would apply for a job as COO at a company.
I thought maybe you would like to know a bit about me too, so here is my CV/ Resume:

Position Applying for: COO

F CV photo
Name: Freddi die Bratfpanne
Age: young and shinny with no scratches

I would like to apply for the position of COO at your company and feel that I am the right “Bratpfanne” for the job. I am motivated and full of energy. I can deal with heated situations without any problems.
As a young dynamic “ Bratpfanne” I know that I could be a valuable…

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Jungfernsteig…Ahoi

HI friends!
Euer,
Freddi die Bratpfanne und Henny in Hamburg

Freddi die Bratpfanne und Henny

Good morning friends,
No we didn’t forget you, it’s just that there is always so much to do and Freddi and me just can’t seem to keep up with all the action!
F&H Alster Arkaden
Freddi and me looking towards the Alster Arkaden… Shopping??

Boots jungfernsteig
Maybe we should take a boat tour of the Alster some time? We’ll have to ask….

F&H shopping
Shopping is just across the street for Freddi and me! Credit cards parat….

photo feet
Our photographer’s feet…. This Selfie is of our photographer’s feet, so at least you know what her feet look like. Freddi and me wanted to post this photo even though our photographer didn’t want us too, but the majority wins here!

Sunny greetings to all.
Euer,
Freddi die Bratpfanne unf Henny in Hamburg

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Hot Coffee and Cleaning the House….

You are probably asking yourself what have both of those in common… more than you think I say!

I read that there is a new coffee cup out there that can keep a cup of coffee warm for up to 45 minutes and then all you have to do is recharge it via USB and away you go with another cup of warm coffee.

This gadget I see as a real thing for guys, but I think it could be easy to say that the hot coffee cup may peter out after a time because if you only like your coffee hot and the battery only lasts 45 minutes… then what is left over, but a sorry cup of cold coffee and a dead battery, and if you don’t have a USB connection available, then you are “S… out of luck”!!!

With all these modern things around “how has one survived so long using a conventional cup for coffee?” Now that is a question that requires deep thought and scientific research.

But coffee is the essence of life; it tastes good, if made right. And with the right gadgets great coffee is just a step away, so to say and cleaning the house somehow goes hand in hand with a cup of coffee. It is said that guys have to do more house work after they retire from work and so I see a whole new dimension as to how to interest guys to do house work.

There you have it guys (once retired) your heated coffee cup, but wait a minute here! Wasn’t there once the headed coaster thing that you could place your coffee mug on and it would keep you mug of coffee warm for awhile??? Away, these sorts of gadgets are just things guys need to get them interested in the world of housework. Gals put your thinking caps on and get those gadgets out!!

Guys you cans have your robot vacuum cleaner (providing endless hours of entertainment) and maybe could hold a sort of vacuum race with your buddies to see who gets the job done first or who has the coolest dishwasher? Then it’s time for a coffee break and your coffee is still warm in your new heated mug…. Post a couple of messages and take a couple of selfies too. Who said housework has to be dull and boring for guys?

It is just an action packed event and this is all because of the new gadgets around these days. Then when the chores are done inside there’s the robot lawnmower to keep you from getting bored outside the house.

Guys, I could think of thousands of action packed ways for you to get involved in housework and not wait until you retire, because by then the coffee maybe cold, and who wants that?

Grocery Store Here I Come!

There is supposed to be a new shopping App on the way that will make my grocery shopping a really fun and a quick experience…….. No more fun wandering the aisle for me!!!

The little App is there to help me and make my life easier or so they say. Just scan your stuff at home that you need to buy and then you are on your way to the grocery store and once inside the GPS system shows you where to find those products….. Why do I have a brain???

I see a nightmare approaching … There I stand in my kitchen and think to myself (thank goodness I can still do that without an App) “High time to go to the grocery store”, now what??? Normally I make myself a list …. Like lots of people do; so I know what I want to buy. Well, I guess that is too old fashioned!

Now I need to take a picture of everything that I want to buy at that one and only grocery store…. Now firstly, I need a Smartphone that I can take pictures with and has App’s and the battery has to be fully charged or else my shopping picture list won’t exist…. This will take more time than me writing my shopping list on a piece of paper….. Where’s my pen????

But what really worries me is the fact that I have to constantly be taking pictures of the packages of things that I have bought and want to buy again. How much time do I have??? Let’s see: the pile of empty packaging that I saved; Smartphone ready to take pictures- laying out all the old packaging … OMG I threw some packaging out…. Now what???? My shopping trip is down the drain and it hasn’t even started yet….. NO bad hair day… But a bad grocery shopping day!!!

With sweat running down my brow I manage after 45 minutes to photograph all the stuff that I want to buy, and I still need to write a list for the stuff that I couldn’t take a picture of… now I am up to 60 minutes being wasted of my time. But saving time is of the essence!!!

There I enter the grocery store and my App automatically sends me a GPS signal so that I can find the stuff that I took a picture of at home quicker… Life can be so simple at times…. No brain required here!

Though I do have to watch were I am going. I don’t want to collide with anyone in my race to save time to get what I took pictures of. But can you image if you bought a product that was a special and the grocery store doesn’t have it anymore and my App doesn’t tell me this…. I feel that could just ruin my GPS shopping experience then and there!!

Now I have to turn to my paper list and there I stand in the middle of an aisle not knowing which way to turn because there is no GPS on my list and I have to depend on my brain power and wander the aisles aimlessly looking for that one product that I couldn’t take a picture of….. The perils of getting lost in the aisles of a grocery store!!!

But what is far worse is the thought that your battery on your Smartphone dies while in the grocery store because I forgot to charge it. Now there you go….. A nightmare that could only happen because I was trying to save time take loads of pictures and run the GPS all at the same time….. Good bye battery

Though with all those time saving Apps and stuff I must admit I will stick to the method that I like to use… the good’ol piece of paper with what I have written on it…. And to manage my way through the aisles of the grocery store… I will take my chances without GPS…. I like challenges and there is no better place than at the grocery store!

So, should you be thinking about going to the grocery store; remember your shopping list and make sure your battery in your Smartphone is fully charged or else…