Married on Mars

Being married and living on Mars may not be such a bad idea if you want to get away from the crowds but it could be a bit of a challenge for the nerves….. Don’t you think???

So it is said that there is someone out there looking for a happy couple that can get along with each other for a long time in a confined space…. How long is long and what is a confined space?????

I am not sure if I would do something like that. To be honest I have a good relationship with my guy but being cooped-up with him in a small space for a long time could change my view of him and maybe what he thinks of me too. That I can be sure of!!!
No more days out with friends and family or going to the office… A good point but then again the office isn’t that bad either.

Ok, I can see it now my guy and me have signed –up and are the couple… we are ecstatic; at least in the beginning because everything is new and seems great and then like everything is ( sounds sooo demoting) everyday life hits. Who is going to clean – not me! I could see this as an extended vacation… But as experience has it; my guy wouldn’t win the “Housekeeper of the year award”, so I’m back where I started from on earth….. I’m disappointed and haven’t even left home yet!!

Though the dehydrated meals are easy to prepare and my guy can do the job!! And I know there won’t be any burnt meals… the wonders of science!! Life at its finest… But to be honest that sort of food is disgusting, and there are no fresh fruits or veggies. Plus, what about a good glass of wine with the meal???
No problem, just whip out the plastic pack of wine and there you go .. your romantic meal for two while floating in space. I think candles could be pushing it a bit and may cause a fire, so I guess you have them on a screen, so to give you a feeling of a romantic dinner while trying not to lose your meal.

Somehow just writing that bit I am starting to feel that life would be a bit boring and sooner or later I am 100% sure you would get on each other’s nerves and then what??????? There’s probably some rest stop on the way where you can stop off for a coffee and stretch your legs… isn’t there??? You know; remember the cartoon program( mature readers will remember this) the family that lived in Space, well maybe it would be like that and you just jet around town meet friends and so on. So you are only confined with your guy or gal for a short period of time.

Because if not and things don’t go as planned …. Is there the outer space divorce kit??? Just pull off at the next planet for a consultation and we can help you for only $1999.99 without the planetary sales tax.

But on the other hand, we could have a great time together and explore the solar system and get to know each other again and enjoy the journey and stop off at a local plant to check out what is going on there and see what the locals are up too, and maybe they would invite us in for a coffee and a chat…. Also not a bad idea?????
Plus, I am sure there is the shopping mall planet where I hopefully can get some good bargains on shoes and handbags, so I’ll put this on my list of places to visit while we are out there.

My guy will surely want to pop by the car dealer’s planet to check out the latest models and maybe pick-up a deal….. Is the space craft big enough for all our stuff that we buy along the way???

One thing is for sure…. I would bring my camera along to take some picture for the family photo album and so when I got back I could have a good’ol look at my pictures with my friends and be the envy of the neighborhood.

So the lucky couple out there who is planning this journey; please don’t forget us and send a postcard… You know our address!

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Looking for that Lady

I thought I had read it all until I stumbled across a headline saying that some guy stole some steaks and wine for his date with some lady. Really now have times gotten sooooo bad where someone has to steal stuff so they can try to impress some chick??? Bad move if you ask me…

That guy should have put a bit of consideration into what he was going to do once he asked a gal out or over to his place and stealing stuff definitely doesn’t really impress gals somehow…. Or have times changed that much????

I can see it now the gal rings the doorbell at the guys place and everything seems so perfect but he is a bit nervous always looking out the window. I would think… ah, he’s got a girlfriend and hasn’t told me or he is married and … well the rest you can imagine. I won’t go into detail here, because if it was one or the other and she did come home; I bet s…. would hit the fan and there would be an interesting exchange of words to say the least and as a gal I would NOT want to experience that!!!

Or again the guy could be worried that he was filmed while the stuff accidentally feel into his pockets in the store and thinks they may find him. The poor gal is sitting at the table enjoying a nice steak and a glass of wine and then……. A knock on the door and the crime team comes in saying to the guy that they are confiscating the meal because the food was stolen. This is definitely something that could ruin a date and she will NEVER want to see the guy again!!!

What brings a person to do something like that and if the guys strapped for cash he could cook a cheap meal or ask his buddies for a couple of bucks so he can buy something for his date but stealing.. That’s a bit much.

So, for those guys out there on a tight budget and aren’t sure… Don’t steal but instead maybe make the good old stand-by meal of spaghetti…. Cheap and easy to cook and with a little creativity it will taste good and your date won’t go sour!

Dinner Disasters

Well dinner disasters can happen on that all important day of the year but since I was soooooo organized it really didn’t faze me; ok, I lied here it did upset me a bit but hey .. Who’s perfect???

My turkey was the highlight of the table at our place and all the other stuff that went with it too, and not to mention that I had maybe had a glass or two – tooooo many of some alcoholic beverage that seemed to send my brain to another plant and not let it concentrate on the important things at hand …… like cooking!!!!

Everything was on track until I smelt a mysterious odor coming from the kitchen. A note: I had apples baking in the oven filled with rum raisins and marzipan. Here timing was essential but somehow my thoughts were not on those apples and you can guess what happened next??????

Bingo….. The apples had taken on a somewhat brownish black color and the marzipan was definitely well done to say the least! I believe everything should be thoroughly baked then no chance any bacteria.

Once I managed to make my way to the kitchen and discover that my lovely apples weren’t so lovely anymore and there was definitely a funny color smoke building up inside the oven I knew then and there the desert would have to be something else…. But what???? Thank goodness that I had some ice cream in stock to save the day and the best part was no one really remembered what I said earlier about baked apples…… The wonders of conversation and drink!!!

Ok, everyone was happy with the ice cream and then someone had to have an espresso which really threw my concept right out the window!!! Espresso…. Did I have any espresso coffee and where the heck did I put the espresso machine???? I knew it was in the basement, but where??? Panicking I went down stairs and found it staring at me from the shelf and so espresso could be served… Thank goodness! I needed a sherry after that shock!!!

Then after serving everyone their espresso … sorry there was no famous actor at our house to drink it with us; just a bunch of normal folks having a good time!!

And the best bit was and please note this- I didn’t have enough espresso coffee, so I mixed normal coffee with it and I can say it tasted really good too and no one complained either. Just a tip if you are ever caught short of not having enough espresso coffee mix regular coffee with it.

But all in all I managed and had a good time on that hectic day and that was the most important thing!

Thanks for Thanksgiving!

Thanksgiving has come and gone in one country and in another everyone is waiting patiently for it to come. Without those brave folks risking their life and limb to cross the Atlantic to start a new life there may not have ever come about the “Thanksgiving Day”. So thank you pilgrims!

Today we only need to go to the grocery store and pick out a turkey and all the other stuff that you want to eat with it and in no time at all you can serve up a great meal for your family and friends. Boy, how easy life can be!!!

Those poor pilgrims had to invest a lot of time into their Thanksgiving meal and that required good planning and hopefully someone would spot a turkey to shot … I’m tired already thinking about the work involved. Then once a turkey was bagged and back home they went and the guys gal had to do the rest of the work, like clean the bird and cook it in a wood stove (maybe- can’t say because I wasn’t around back then.)or an open fire until it was done…. Thank goodness for electric ovens!

These thoughts bring back fond memories of my mom cooking us a wonderful meal on that day and the smell of the turkey cooking lingering in the air… I’m getting hungry!!! My mom invested a lot of time too.. Ok, not as much as the pilgrim gals, but still it did take her sometime. And I can say it was worth every minute that I waited. Some years it seemed like December because there was snow on the ground outside on Thanksgiving Day. I wonder did the pilgrims have snow on Thanksgiving Day way back then??

Though Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks and be with your family and friends but somehow I feel it has lost its touch and become very commercialized. We should be thankful that we can be together with our family and friends and that everyone is healthy and can enjoy a lovely meal together no matter what you serve on that day.
You don’t need to spend a fortune just to try to impress people on that day. It’s a day of giving thanks and should be remember as that.

Enjoy your Thanksgiving Day this week and remember to give thanks for the great food that you are served and to appreciate the work involved in it.

Merry me or Wait for me

Now you may not be able to guess what this is about or do you know? It’s about tying the knot and believe me for some folks that could be a long wait for their fiancée.

Now I know you should never rush in too fast to tie the knot of marriage. Fist you really need to get to know each other to be on the safe side of things; like I read the other day that couple decided to get engaged but not married because they wanted to be sure. How sure I ask and why did they get engaged if they want to wait?

Anyone know the answer here?

It could be that now-a-days getting married isn’t like it used to be and with the choices of guys and gals out there you want to make sure you have made the right choice before jumping into the hornets’ nest of marriage. Marriage isn’t always a bed of roses as they say and can sometimes be a bit trying on the nerves.

But I believe that’s why couples live longer because of the training of their nerves which makes your heart healthy because you can stand-up to anything that confronts you. Ok, please don’t misunderstand me here. I have nothing against marriage and think it’s great.

But I can image how those folks think about waiting a bit before jumping into that hot bed of marriage. Though how long do you wait? This question does not leave my mind… oh please

This is my theory for waiting:

  1. Make sure the guys has enough money – gals we need to keep up our supply of handbags and shoes or else that’s the end of life!
  2. Make sure someone can cook – nothing worse than coming home from work and no hot meal is on the table. A sure fire route to disaster.
  3. Both can use the washing machine – saves hours of slaving and gals this way we have more time for the important things in life like gossiping.
  4. Has he bought me the right size of diamond ring – love is shown by the size of the diamond or is the ad different?
  5. Is one of you a blanket hog – trouble in the bedroom! The hornets’ nest is starting to buzz….
  6.  Who has cold feet – a romantic killer – with this you can forget everything!
  7. Snoring – ear plugs please

 

Those I guess are really good reasons to wait to see if you jump into the pond of marriage and if the guy or gal passes the test than by all means you can get married.

Though it would be advisable to have a score card handy to jot down any of the numbers that seem to be troubling you and then after say 10 years you can compare scores with each other and then decide to set the wedding date.

And if you are planning ahead naturally the whole trial period should be with a limited guarantee, so if something should go sour then you can separate in a peaceful manner. Boy how easy life can be….

So, if you are considering tying the knot do make sure that you have chosen the right model and not get stuck with the wrong model – enjoy your trial period and then get married!!

 

The smell of great food

Today brings back memories of my childhood where my mom would always cook-up a real great tasting meal for us and we would devour it in less than 30 minutes.

My mom spent hours in the kitchen preparing the meal. We never ate fish like other folks; we ate roast beef and boy was that good!!

I was always amazed at how my mom always managed to whip-up such a great meal and after slaving in the kitchen for hours still be in a good mood. Though one year her mood turned sour when Cesar our Great Dane dog did something that got him thrown out of the house for a couple of days.

Like always on this day every year my grandparents were there and my mom was busy like always and I had to stay out of the way and keep an eye on Cesar too. I wasn’t too happy about keeping an eye on the dog because I wanted to do other things like play outside. But since I was cleaned up for the day that meant staying inside whiling my time away with the dog.

Cesar and I were having a good time in my bedroom reading books together on my bed. He was a very attentive listener and knew good literature when he heard it, but somehow I must have dosed off reading to him and never noticed that he had slipped off the bed and left my bedroom and snuck downstairs into the kitchen where my mom was basting the roast beef -> bingo!!

My mom had placed the OPEN roasting pan on the oven door and had her back turned to the oven and how Cesar managed was beyond me. But he managed some how to get the roast beef out of the roasting pan without burning himself and came back up stairs into my room with the roast in his mouth.

You can image the scream that came from the kitchen from my mom!!!

And at the same time she screamed I woke up to find Cesar lying at the foot of my bed enjoying a roast. I was still somewhat a sleep but when my mom & dad came into my room I was wide awake and Cesar was pulled off the bed and the roast was taken away from him and I got in big trouble for not keeping an eye on the dog.

Poor Cesar had to stay outside for a couple of days in the cold.

My mom was really upset to say the least and so we were served bread and gravy with vegetables because the roast was already eaten.

I must say when I look back at that day, that it was somehow great fun and the food was good too. There was never a dull day at our house when I was growing up and my mom had nerves of steel to put up with such goings on. But there’s one thing for sure no matter how dire things were she always had a smile on her face and said a kind word about everything.

I wish everyone reading this a Happy Easter and enjoy your time with your family and friends!

Looking for Mr. or Ms. Marble

I never before thought about being in love with a marble statue but supposedly somewhere in the world someone is.
This could be seen as bringing a whole new meaning to the words dating and relationships for guys and gals.

I’ll be somewhat old fashioned and start with “Ladies first” and list the pros and cons of such a relationship.

Pros
Your Mr. Marble never argues with you -> now this is a real plus and saves your nerves and you won’t go gray so fast from arguing with someone.

Never complains -> This is even better because there is no one there to say that dinner is cold or his shirts aren’t pressed right and so forth.

Virtually maintenance free -> never have to do any laundry or clean up after him, so this means more free time to do what you want.

There are many other things too that I could list here but then I would run out of space.

Though there are a couple of cons to a Mr. Marble too:

Mr. Marble can’t talk -> this makes for a very one sided conversation and could get boring after awhile, and because I love to talk; I am not too sure about such a guy.

Can’t take me out ->now here’s a real problem. Just think about it; you reserved a table at a nice restaurant and you show up with Mr. Marble and take your seat and he is seated next to you. Well, don’t be surprised if you get some strange looks, and the worst part is when you are finished you have to pay for the meal yourself, plus you never get invited out by Mr. Marble.

I like to be invited out, so this defiantly wouldn’t work for me!

The worst one is driving around in your car. You have to chauffeur Mr. Marble everywhere and pay for the gas on top of that too. But if you own a bicycle you can put Mr. Marble in the basket and ride around with him and be the envy of all your gal friends.

Still somehow a real guy seems more appealing to me. But then again I never had a Mr. Marble.

The worst thought of all is; what happens when Mr. Marble accidentally falls on the floor and shatters into a thousand pieces??? Will you be able to replace him and is he insured with accidental cover?

Otherwise, there could be serious trouble in your life, unless to deliberately threw Mr. Marble on the ground because you had enough of him and wanted a newer model. Now that’s not bad. No arguing crying or divorce. One drop and he’s out of your life!

Now guys, I haven’t forgotten you here either. There’s the Ms. Marble version who will never talk back to you either and can sit next to you hours on end as you watch sports on TV and never complaining about it. Or just plain o’l cruise around with Ms. Marble in the car and be the envy of all your buddies and the advantage of Ms. Marble is she’s a cheap date.
No more spending money on needless dates that don’t lead anywhere because Ms. Marble won’t lead you anywhere either. Ms. Marble will always have a face of stone so no worries there either.

This whole issue brings you to think that times are really changing and if you want to keep abreast of them, then maybe you should consider in investing in a Mr. or Ms. Marble at an unbelievable cheap price of $19.95 plus tax and a five year guarantee against rust. So rush out now before Friday and pick yourself up one for a stress free weekend.

Need a New Guy??

On Saturday while reading the newspaper I came across the section where guys are looking for gals and thought to myself “I have to read this, but how?
Because with my husband sitting across from me it would be rather difficult and I don’t want him to think that I want to replace him for someone who I read about in the newspaper.

But since it was a sunny day I knew that sooner or later he would go outside and wash the car, and if it was up to me it could be sooner. Then I wouldn’t have to wait soooo long to read this section of the newspaper with all those great guy ads.
It seemed to take ages before he went outside and then he asked me: If everything was ok, because I seemed a bit impatient today as if I wanted to get rid of him?

Do men have a built in App that tells them what gals are thinking?

Anyways, he finally went outside and I could finally finish reading the newspaper and take a closer look at what’s on offer out there in the world of guys.

A couple of agencies had toll-free numbers, so you could save money and others you had to call at your own expense (tight wads).
A lot of guys were older models looking for younger gals not older than 40 and offering them: cash, vacations and maybe more. The maybe more I found a bit vague because that could mean anything and probably not what I think it is.

There was a guy who said he was romantic, played golf and the accordion too. Now that I found really good because my husband can play golf but not the accordion, and this somehow gets me dreaming about being on the golf course with this guy.

The date starts at the first hole and he has teed-off and then I place my ball on the tee and he hands me a rose and my heart starts to flatter and before I have a chance to tee-off he plays a lovely tune on his accordion. This brings goose bumps to my skin and fall in love with him until we reach the 15th hole and he doesn’t have any beer with him for me to enjoy so my whole bubble of love has popped.

Another ad states that the guy is romantic, likes good food and no conversation.

How that works don’t ask me and I would not want a date with him either. I can see it now. I show up at his place he says to me you can cook and he sits there and watches some stupid program on TV and I end up eating what I cooked myself because he is busy texting his friends that he has got some chick at his place to cook for him. I like to talk and so that relationship would not work out for me.

The final ad was for a guy who owned a company and the chick could work for him as a “girl Friday”, and it is written in black & white: She by no means is to live at his place!!!

He is a real character and seems to have a one track mind wanting to boss others around and to top it off; I have to have my own place!! He’s got nerve…..

After reading all those ads I started to look out the window at my husband washing our car and thought -> he really isn’t such a bad guy after all when I compare him to the guys in the newspaper.

Plus an afterthought is that I have no idea whether or not the guys have even written the truth in the newspaper or is everything exaggerated so that all single gals will fall for them?

Who knows and who cares. All I can say if you want some good reading in the newspaper by all means read this section!!

Gal’s day

I totally forgot that yesterday was World Women’s Day. What kind of woman am I then? Please don’t think that I don’t like being women because I forgot this day. My problem was I had to work and do all the things women do in our modern society.

I ask how come nobody ever throws a party for us gals on that day and we get the day off, naturally with pay. Hopefull wishing on my part…

I recently found some interesting reading literature about how us gals used to be years ago, and I must say I would fail in all areas and it went something like this, though I cannot remember exactly.

• Greet you partner with a smile when he comes home and make sure you are wearing a dress and make-up. -> My partner would be suspicious right away and ask me what I was up to and were had I been and if I am feeling ok. Definitely a bad idea in my household!

• Make him a drink and listen to him complain about his day -> What about me? Maybe I need a drink after hearing him.

• Cook for him -> And then he doesn’t show up on time and he complains that the meal is soggy. No thank you; I don’t want that headache.

• Show him your love -> Right, I’m dead tired from work, shopping and household and I am supposed to be in the mood, sorry!

I wonder if anyone really did that stuff and did it work???? Somehow I can’t imagine that it functioned more than a week at tops because I wouldn’t have the energy to carry out such a charade for a whole week let along my whole life.
Though my problem could be that my mom never gave me the right training but then again when I think back about my mom (bless her sole) wasn’t like that either. So, how could I learn anything?

I think they need to reinvent this whole thing about who does what and when. I love to boss people around at work but at home that doesn’t seem to function so well my husband just looks at me and says: “ Honey, you’re at home now remember.” I could pop him one.

This whole business about emancipation and such is it really there and have times really changed that much? Or is it just an illusion that we gals like to think that we are modern and the men still have the trousers on? I have been contemplating this question for years and still haven’t come up with an answer and probably never will.

We gals must just enjoy life where ever the path takes us.

The passing away of my cell phone

My trusty cell phone (without apps) after many years of faithful service decided to say good bye to me and make its way to cell phone heaven. This was a very sad day for me and I am sure many of you have experienced this too. It’s like losing a good friend and if my phone could speak it could have told you many a tale.

After mourning for a few days I finally pulled myself together and visited the store of my provider and I knew once when I passed through those doors I would have to dig deep into my pocket for a new trusty cell phone. You have no idea how heartbroken I was, too slowly see and experience that my trusty phone was no longer able to perform its normal functions and that it was beyond repair. -> I cried

Now inside the store I never realized before what a vast selection there is of cell phones and they come in every shape size and color and with so many devices to choose from I am flabbergasted. Plus with all the things these phones can do I’m pretty sure they can cook-up a good dinner too if you push the right button or app. That’s modern technology at its finest!

Then all of a sudden a sale woman about my age approaches me with a blouse on that’s soooooo tight the buttons are about to pop off and her chest would put a Holstein cow to shame (garage job). If you know what I mean? I thought this chick is here for the guy customers to distract them so that they will spend more money than they actually intended to spend.

A word of advice gals -> hold onto your guy when you go into this store!!!!

Anyways, she asks me: Can I help you and your husband? I thought to myself she’s not speaking to me hopefully because you can clearly see that I am alone.
The she looked right at me and repeated the same question. I looked at her and said: “Yes, you can help me.” And she said “What about your husband?” I thought are you nuts – there’s isn’t one man in the whole store and what’s my husband got to do with this here?

I said “ I can manage to choose my new cell phone alone.” Boy did that take the wind out of her sails fast and I got a real dirty look to boot. Now she was confronted with me and that meant she may have to work because I wasn’t so impressed with her big t..ts.
I knew right from the start that she didn’t know a thing about cell phones because when I asked her about a certain model she wasn’t even sure if they even sold that brand. I thought great!! But then again I thought this could be fun and so asked her if they had a cell phone that was made in C…a ?
And she so expertly answered me by saying that she has no idea where cell phones are manufactured – so I knew now that I was in good hands here with a real professional sales woman.

Well, we discussed the tariffs and other such options that the company offers and we came to an agreement and I signed all the papers.
But before I left the shop I experienced another heartbreaking blow.

The sale woman said to me that I could dispose of my old phone by putting it in the recycling bag next time I come by. I told the woman how she can be so insensitive and talk that way about my beloved phone that had just passed away. And then she said to me with tears in her eyes “ I understand exactly what you are going through because my phone passed away last month and I had my phone longer then I was married and I loved my phone dearly maybe even more then my husband. I said: “Oh, that’s interesting to hear.”

So you see we all love our cell phones whether we like to admit it or not. Cherish yours and when it comes time gently set it to rest in cell phone heaven.