My Handbag hasn’t got a Leak yet…

Really now, there is something for everyone nowadays, and that includes the lovers of handbags… including me!!
I just got to reading earlier this morning and low and behold what article popped into my face.. Yes, a handbag that serves/ holds your favorite beverage…
Not like you think though… it has a built-in thingy that holds your beverage of choice… and to be honest, okay, if you don’t want others to know that you are taking a nip of a certain beverage, but otherwise I am not tooooo convinced of its functionality, and a spigot on the side of the bag is not my idea of a good looking hand bag nor of cleanliness either. Or am I just out of it when it comes to fashion statements???

Plus, a small bottle of water or the sorts is just as good and just imagine, you fill your handbag up with a beverage and the container springs a leak… Then what!!! Scream or cry or maybe even both, if you’ve got some precious things in your handbag…..

My eyes are watering already with that thought… or even worse my Mascara is running down my face at this thought…. Everything is ruined, but then to prevent this I need the super duper waterproof bag in a bag to prevent the worst case scenario….

But, you never know… Invited to a party or out with friends … You got it!! Beverages are on hand and if a group of you have the same sort of handbags then…. Hey, let’s have a party!!! Drinks galore!!! I mean really, I always have a couple of cups in my hand bag for such occasions; should I run into a friend with that sort of handbag. I bet you have cups in your handbag, too???

Though I must be honest here and say that none of my friends have such handbags… Why they don’t I cannot say… Sorry
A somewhat concerning thought for me is while I am out and about and may have a bit of red wine left over from last evening in my bag( please don’t tell anyone my secret here) and I accidently catch the spigot on my clothing …. Then a red wine stain and how do I explain that at work and hope that everyone believes me???? Any answers???
Plus, how do I clean this beverage container thingy handbag?? I feel really perplexed with such thoughts.. Or who cares …

Another thought is how much does such a handbag cost and where can I buy one, should I ever what one??? And does it have a built in cooling system for those hot days in the summer or does it keep my beverages warm in the winter and what does it weigh…. These questions need to be answered, don’t they and I bet you thought the same as I was thinking, but just afraid to ask those questions… Don’t be, because no question is too dumb, if you don’t know the answer…

Though, should any of you out there own such a handbag, please do let us all know and maybe even send us a picture of you using it… Thanks, we are all curious, too!

Enjoy you handbag no matter what style it is….

Advice Headlines

I got to looking at advice headlines online for a bit of a change in my reading style…. Not that I am looking for advice but I wanted to read about what concerns other people.

There was the guy in love with someone he works with….. To me that seems like trouble and if everyone in the office knows about it… I think this problem answers itself… It could be that he is like a little boy in love…Staring out the window dreaming of the tender moments that he could share with that person or he is texting that person with poems and dreams of their love that will never be…. My advice to the guy: get focused and sort yourself out! Get a foot back on the ground and forget it; I would not want to lose my job because of some silliness.

Taking a short nap at work… Now that is a great idea! Arrange to have a nap every afternoon from say 1:00pm to 4:00pm and then once rested up you can go home at 5:00pm. Life couldn’t be better….. Please where can I apply for that job and does it pay well?

Now this is an all time great: My garden …. And how that fits with the other two I am not sure and can only presume that it is something like this: Guy is at work having a nap and dreaming about the person he is in love with at work. There you have it. A lovely flower garden idyllic, birds singing and lovely trees the feeling of tranquility is in the air they are there in each other’s arms; when suddenly the boss comes in and screams “ What the h…. are you doing, sleeping on my time?” . Bad idea napping at work!

Another daunting thought: someone thinks everyone is against them… Okay, that’s bad, but it can’t be true. I know everyone doesn’t like me and to be honest it doesn’t bother me either. I would say…Stop worrying and get on with things, before you miss out on all the great things that are happening in life!

A real one: Problems in the bedroom….. OMG!!! I don’t think a news paper can help that couple or the guy dreaming at work (I am not too sure who they were writing about). They need to seek professional help or talk to each other like folks did one time… that could help too. Let’s see what happens and find out who it is????

The normal one some famous person…. Bla,bla,bla boring… I want action like the topics above!!!

But once I read all those tidbits of advice I didn’t and don’t feel any the wiser and I wonder do the people who wrote in feel any better about the response that they received and did the guy in love at work solve his problem and did he get in trouble for taking a nap????
These are unanswered questions and I feel like I am left hanging here… I want to know how the guy’s life is going and was it him with the bedroom problems…. Please people answer my questions, so that I know advice can be real and have real results!

Take my advice and read all the wonderful bits of advice, but be careful, they may not give you the answer you were looking for!

My Brain

This is something that we all have. Thank goodness mine is still functioning and hasn’t gotten lost to an App.
It is reported that the size of your brain influences the number of friends you have though I find the study a bit questionable because they only checked out less than 50 people.

I never realized before that if my brain was small I wouldn’t have many friends or none at all and if it was crammed into my cranium because it was sooooo large I would have lots of friends.

Personally am not sure where I stand on this scale because I haven’t had my brain measured and am not sure if I have the right amount of friends. Has anyone out there had their brain measured to see if they have the right amount of friends?

I am not even sure if I want to leave the house today because the people on the street may realize the size of my brain and then know how many friends I have. Plus all my friends do they know the size of their brain? I am starting to get scared thinking about all this.

If I go to the doctor and have a brain scan then I would know and could adjust my life accordingly to the size of my brain. I would not want it to be known that I have a large brain and not enough friends to correlate with the size of my brain. Another scary thought for me is if my brain is small and I have lots of friends then my brain may blow a fuse or short-circuit leaving me in a state. What should I do???

Another question is: What about all those people on those social networks who have lots of sooo called friends are their brains large? Or that doesn’t count? I took it that real-time friends counted and not virtual ones.

My brain is now whirling with thoughts about this and I have started to group my friends together and wonder what should I do?

Group 1: friends for sports -> very limited 5 people (small brain)

Group 2: friends for shopping -> large group 10 people (middle-sized brain)

Group 3: friends for meeting-up with -> very large group 20 people (large brain)

After grouping all my friends together I feel my brain could have a problem and now I must consult a brain doctor, and ask: Can I meet with all the groups because of the number of people in each group?

Actually, maybe the study was done so that the researchers could snag some of your friends because they don’t have many themselves and as a result are trying to make me worry about the size of my brain.
I am quite content with my brain and it has been with me for years and helped me through many a situation so why should I worry about its size?

Furthermore, how many friends do I need? I am content with the number of friends I have now and wouldn’t dump them for the world because their great people!

Friends are great people and don’t worry about the size of your brain or else you may not have any friends.

The Death of the Encyclopedia

A sad day has now come to our lives as I read yesterday. A company in England that has been printing encyclopedias for hundreds of years will stop printing them. Those wonderful works of art; that we will no longer be able to hold in our hands and enjoy its trove of information is coming to an end. This is heart breaking news and if I had enough money I would buy the company and keep printing those wonderful books.

I remember those wonderful books from my childhood. They supplied me with all the answers to my questions and filled my brain with ideas and the longing to learn more. My parents even up-dated our encyclopedias yearly, so that we had the most up-to-date information. And by doing that we weren’t be behind the times.

Those books helped me with many an essay for high school or my science project and accompanied me through college giving me the wisdom so I could graduate. I remember holding those treasured books in my hand with their leather-bound covers that smelt so nice and the richly illustrated pages explaining to me everything that I wanted to know and more.

Those lovely books stood proudly in the bookshelf at our house there on display in alphabetical order so whoever came by could see that we were readers and had an interest in things. And if I asked my parents a question they couldn’t answer they always said “Look in the encyclopedia and there you will find the answer.” And I did that and was always satisfied with what I found. Plus sometimes I found out even more and this quest for knowledge could be satisfied with those great books.

Now-a-days I only have abridged editions but I own them and I have a couple of others in other languages too, because you don’t find that sort of information anymore.

Things are getting lost in the era of the internet and if you aren’t connected to the internet you seem to be left behind. I ask myself “If you don’t have internet access; how do you get information about certain things?” If there are no encyclopedias anymore in the book form then what do you do? Or is society becoming a mass of people with stagnating brains who have no quest for knowledge?

Hold on to your beloved encyclopedias with it treasure trove of information and you may still even be able to use them to answer your question about something and it still looks good on the book shelf too!

Ink cartridges

Actually I didn’t want to write something today but what I experienced yesterday in the ink cartridge section of an electronics store is worth it.

While I was standing there in the ink cartridge section of the electronics store trying to find the right ink cartridge for my printer; I noticed out of the corner of my left eye a guy about 48 years old(I guess)and I could feel him staring at me, so I turned to look at him and he gave me a smile that said “ Hey, baby want a good time?”
Well, I gave him a look that said “I’ll break your arm if you try anything.” I could clearly see he got the message that I wasn’t interested in him.
But while I was still standing there another woman came along about his age and gave him a smile and was eyeing him. I knew now that I needed to hang around here a bit longer to see what would happen.

Years ago the vegetable section of the grocery store was the hot pick-up spot, but times have changed, now it’s the ink cartridge section of an electronics store. Who knows???

It’s true that you have a large variety of ink cartridges to choose from and it goes without saying that this could be a hot topic to talk about. I mean who wants to talk about cooking anymore when you can talk about changing an ink cartridge and then make a date with the other person.(How moving.)

I can see it now -> He asks you “Would you like to come over to my place and have a glass of wine and we can look at my printer too?”

How can a gal say no to such an offer? I would say “Yes” if he owns the right printer.

There you are you show up at his doorstep and he lets you in and you start with the normal small talk and a glass of wine and then he asks the moving question “ Would you like to see my printer?” I say “ok” and off to his home office it is. He opens the door of the room flicks on the light and there on his desk is an old ink jet printer and I stand there heartbroken because it wasn’t the sort of printer that I thought he would have! The whole time he was in the store he was bragging about his printer and leading me on .How could he do that to me???

I smiled and said “That’s a lovely printer.” But he knew my heart wasn’t there and so I had to let him down gently by saying that my printer is newer and it scans too. He seemed devastated but knew that we weren’t compatible.

Sorry, back to real life. The guy in the store started talking to the woman and asking her questions. That too my surprise she answered until he asked her “Do you want to be my girlfriend?” She told him in no uncertain terms to “ F…OFF!!!” He asked a straight forward question and got a straight forward answer.

I thought wow; that’s how it is now-a-days. Guys ask right out “Do you want to be my girlfriend?” They don’t waste time like years ago trying to get to know you or meet for a date. Now it’s you’re my girlfriend or not.

A tip to all you guys cruising for chicks in the ink cartridge section of an electronics store. Please use a better pick-up line if you want to meet chicks otherwise your ink may run out.

Books & Language

Because I love to read (my App friends will hate me for this) I stumbled across a book about everyday America and its words and idiomatic phrases and because the book is in two languages it makes it more interesting.

But as I am sure many of you may not understand its contents, so I thought I would help you along here by listing these wonderful words and there meanings. Please note this is not a direct translation always and I do not use one of those internet translators either. Though I must admit they are good for a laugh because they never get the wording right.

Instructions for reading: American word first and the translation follows and if you have any questions do not ask because we do not have the answer either.

Apple polisher -> brown noser

Behind the times -> Toooo old and you better catch up on how things are today.

Billion -> Spending way too much money that you don’t have

Call it a day -> I have had enough of work and my colleagues for today and now what to go home and see what I can stir-up there.

A Diamond is forever -> Honey start saving your money if you want to marry me!

Facts of life -> I have no idea and probably never will. Ask someone else if you want the answer.

Girl Friday -> The chick the boss is having an affair with.

Holidays -> Something I have never heard of.

Jaywalk -> How to get hit by a car.

Keep your shirt on -> By all means if the guys good-looking he can take it off.

Lost generation -> Someone trying to find themselves.

No-Kidding -> You have nothing better to say.

Phoney -> There’s a lot of that around today.

Scoop -> Good gossip amongst the girls.

Think tank -> Over paid people trying to bid for more time.

Walk out -> Leave your partner for a newer model.

Women’s lib -> Does this exist and what is it?

Zero in on something -> It may take a while until I understood what you were saying.

So now after reading this you are an expert at American English and you do not need to use a dictionary – oh, sorry I mean an App to understand someone.

My life’s an app

Remember the days when you used to use your brain to think and answer questions when someone asked you something, and now-a-days the brain seems to be a stagnating mass within your head.

I can remember when you read something about something and actually remembered it or if you didn’t you could look it up in an encyclopedia and there you found the answer to your question and all this without an app.

I think back and ask myself: “How did I ever manage to get through my day without an app?” And the funny thing is I am still here and my brain still works without an app and I can remember information. I do not want to get addicted to an app. What happens if it is wrong? Then what do I do? Has anyone thought about that or are they trying to invent an app for that?

The other day at work we got talking about the world and stuff like that and one of my colleagues asked me what the longest river in the world was. ( I knew they wanted to see if I could manage without an app.)I answered without hesitating – the Nile and 2nd is the Amazon and 3rd is the Mississippi. Of course no one believed me and they said “well let me check this out because I have an app that will give us the answer.” I thought to myself “ok”.
Well low and behold I was right and I knew this and the information came directly from my brain cells. Amazing things brain cells. Those babies can really remember things and process information and help you with all sorts of things and this all without an app!

Sorry, got side tracked there with my brain cells. My colleagues then asked me another question and I was right again and then they got a bit sarcastic and said that I must sit home every evening and read up on such stuff. I had to laugh at that and said they maybe should read something and not always be dependent on an app.

Everywhere you turn there are these bloody things.

Apps for weather – as if I can’t look out the window and see if it’s raining or not.

Apps for your wardrobe – it’s a sad day when I can’t figure out what to wear from the clothes that I have hung in my closet.

Apps for a coffee shop – what happened to asking someone where a good coffee shop is? An app can’t know this or do apps drink coffee secretly?

Apps to locate you – I don’t want everyone to know when I am sitting on the throne or is that important information for everyone?

And those are just a few. I could write a list that would be endless and that I don’t want to do.

I was actually thinking about creating a group called “ I want to keep my brain and not let it turn into an app.” Though I don’t think that many people would be interested in my group because everyone is busy with their apps trying to find out about the group and then only to disappointed by saying that this group doesn’t have an app and that we use our brains and communicate with each other the old-fashioned way by talking to each other (those were the days!).

Try going through your day without an app and I bet you can have some fun.